Hey fans

You’ve probably heard by now that a comment I made about Anne Frank has caused a bit of a reaction.

Who’s Anne Frank, you ask? Good question. Until my bloody tour manager, Gary, suggested visiting her house I had no idea.

When Gary said, ‘Hey, we should go visit Anne Frank’s house,’ I thought she was that chick who represented Slovenia in Eurovision. Turns out, this is another Anne Frank.

Apparently, Anne Frank lived during the Second World War and hid in an attic from the Nazis or something. It didn’t end well ’cause all that stuff happened.

Anyway, she wrote a diary that is like way famous and apparently lots of people have read it.

Gary said she was an important reminder of the darker side of humanity and taught us of the constant need to remain vigilant against our more base motives.

I suggested we go sneaker shopping instead. Gary said no.

Anyway we rock around to the Anne Frank House museum and they tell us all about Anne Frank and what happened to the people hiding there. It was totally sad.

I then decided to write the following message in the guestbook.

“Truly inspiring to be able to come here. Anne was a great girl. Hopefully she would have been a Belieber.”

This has not been received well. Mostly by Gary.

But come on, guys! I just wrote what everyone was thinking. I mean, given her age she probably wouldhave been a Belieber.

I bet there’s not a single historical figure out there that you haven’t all looked at and thought, ‘Hmmmm, wonder if they were a Belieber?’

I’ve always been sure Martin Luther King, Jr would have been and I’m sure 19^th century women’s rights advocate, Lucretia Mott, was.

Really, when you think about it, what else would she be? A Directioner! Yeah, right.

Anyway, I still fail to see how what I said could be offensive to anyone. If you look at my message I said Anne was ‘a great girl’ and she probably was!

I also said ‘hopefully’ Anne was a Belieber: no assumption there and remember, I hope everyone is a Belieber.

Hopefully, this all blows over soon. Gary says I don’t understand the scale of my insensitivity to what is arguably the worst episode in human history but then Gary says something like that to me every few weeks.

He says as punishment I now have to read Anne Frank’s Diary. I hope its as good as some of those diaries my fans send me with the pictures.

Later

JB