Collingwood have just announced they will introduce a new ‘match day experience’ for this season.
In my opinion, anyone who uses the term ‘match day experience,’ should be immediately banned from any future involvement in football.
The ‘match day experience’ I want is football and I say that even as a Melbourne supporter.
This focus on ‘match day experience’ means the ‘product’ (to use another ridiculous phrase used to make dumb people sound smart) is not the sport but a variety of trivial distractions.
If your sport needs fireworks, BMX stunt riders and dancers to keep people’s attention, you’re in bigger trouble than you realise.
Nothing is wrong with the sport of Aussie Rules. It is a joy to watch and the players are as exciting as ever.
Here’s what’s ruined the ‘match day experience’, last season’s criminally awful fixture, ridiculously high food prices, variable ticketing and a series of substandard games due to expansion.
Fireworks will fix none of these.
But kids are bored at the footy, people say. Good.
Kids aren’t bored enough these days.
I remember being bored at the footy as a kid, then I started to understand it and then I loved it.
Lot’s of rewarding things aren’t instantly exciting or enjoyable. I didn’t like whiskey the first time and now I can’t get up in the morning without it.
Going to the footy is great because footy is great. It’s the greatest thing ever invented in the history of humans.
Just make it affordable, put it on at a good time and get out of the way.
This is not rocket science.
COMMENTS
Bryce
Feb 19, 2015
Couldn't agree more. The footy game is the thing, not dancers or Meatloaf.
Scott
Feb 19, 2015
Head nail thingy...
Mace
Feb 19, 2015
Glad I have Titus to distract me in the off season. Cricket and (God forbid) tennis just don't cut it. I didn't mind the Asian Cup soccer. Yes it can and should be called "soccer". Soccer is short for association football, which is the true name of the sport. There are many types of football in the world and it is arrogant of the soccer crowd to think they own the name "football". Anyway, that has nothing to do with this article...
Ferg
Feb 19, 2015
100% could not agree more.
Hank
Feb 19, 2015
YUP.
Collingwood are not required to do anything other than be available to get trashed every other week.
Get back in yer box Ed.
Zorro
Feb 19, 2015
AMEN brother!
Grmpee1
Feb 19, 2015
What wonderful insight you have
I was thinking to nominate you as AFL chief ( but then you would become one of them, so I wont .)
Geoff
Feb 19, 2015
Hallelujah Praise Titus
Roland Garros
Feb 19, 2015
Love the comment "Kids aren't bored enough these days".
As a young fella I got bored at the footy so I started collecting empty aluminium beer cans and swapping 1000 cans for $10.00. Good coin in 1979!
Pancho Pete
Feb 19, 2015
Could just be your best yet Titus. Can you now employ all your powers towards stopping what Eddie believes will be the ultimate 'match NIGHT experience'.
Tim
Feb 19, 2015
Spot on - forget the impedimentia. It is all about the footy!
And yes - unconscionably high food and beverage prices including $7.00 beers are a worry - I imagine that is a result of a competitive tender (or is that evaluation?) process for catering rights.
Ashley Fellowes
Feb 19, 2015
I'd be thinking the ideal matchday experience would be watching your team win would it not? Seriously....slip in a few VFL games pre match would majorly help. My 2.5 cents.
Jordan
Feb 19, 2015
Bloody Oath mate. Spot on.
Daniel
Feb 19, 2015
Thank you!
And the Roar Meter (I follow the Tigers).
And the ads that are louder than a jackhammer at 6am on a Sunday morning.
And the fat, old guys playing some hybrid of football at half-time.
And the Kiss-o-Meter.
Doc
Feb 19, 2015
Amen to that Titus. You said it all when you said it.
curious
Feb 19, 2015
spot on.
Rick
Feb 19, 2015
Isn't your winter's match day experience skis and a chairlift?
Coady
Feb 20, 2015
Aaah Titus, wisdom seldom found in a normal footy critic...
Snarky the Snarky Sharky
Feb 23, 2015
My idea of a match day experience would include not being forced to see whatever that girl waving the flag is wearing on her head. Whoopi Goldberg is not a white Collingwood supporter!
labrooy
Feb 23, 2015
Not sure what is worse, the inane rant of the author or the mindless hero-worship of his followers.
GN
Feb 24, 2015
Toss up isn't it ? Lighten up old fella
labrooy
Feb 24, 2015
That was a light-hearted comment. I was just noticing that not one person disagrees in any way with the author. Time for some people to actually do some thinking for themselves.
MartyC
Mar 10, 2015
Wow, that's an unusually serious post... But spot on!!
And we can do without boundary riders can't we ... That clown that used to "warm up" the crowd at Telstr-Etihad (or whatever it is called now) and the MCG gets up my goat.... Pete Lazer I think his name is or was! That man should go back to cooking chocolate with Roger Federer: http://www.petelazer.com/
On the subject of stadium names, can we please go back to calling Kardinia Park, Kardinia Park!!!
stublogs
May 06, 2015
Yup, couldn't agree more, here's my thoughts after attending my first game in 2015, https://stublogs.wordpress.com/2015/05/06/the-match-day-experience/
HawkeyedHawk
Apr 07, 2016
Titus you missed the whole point of Collingwood announcing "Match Day Experience".
The "Match Day Experience" is Collingwood's rebranded way of saying, "This season will be better than last!"
By that, they really mean. They expect to beat at least 1 more team than last year.
Get ready for a shock!
Eddie will not be boasting, "Book your Grand Final ticket now! " 3 wins into the season.
Travis Cloke will not miss ANY goals! (mainly because we have him playing behind the goal line so it's just not possible.....)
Jesse White will be accountable and provide a foil for Travis. (Actually, we gave him the CFC Credit Card. We sent him down to Coles to buy some foil. We're also trying a new tactic called Window. Hopefully that will confuse the opposition and they'll think it's confetti and run into it and it'll tear them to shreds while we kick goals. The other hope is that it'll confuse them when shooting for goals and kick to us and we'll kick more goals!! Win, win!!)
Fasolo and Sidebottom will continue doing what they do best. Like the pop up shop boxes in Westfield. Pop-up for a week, kick 6 goals. come back 4 weeks later for another 6 goals. Alternating obviously.
The backline we expect to do exactly what it did last year......
Pendles and Swannie are on holiday at the moment and are looking for the new boys to shoulder the load.
We did ask Chris Judd, but he said both shoulders were still sore from carrying West Coast AND Carlton!
ciao
HawkeyedHawk
Apr 07, 2016
@MartyC the Cattery is the preferred name...or Geelong's home ground. Then, I know I know, you know, we know, what ground we are talking about.