Want to write a pre-season story to fill up those column inches and get the editor off your back?

Nothing going on? Don’t want to put in much effort?

Well, here’s the only template you’ll ever need to churn out pre-season footy story after pre-season footy.

(Insert players surname) Impresses on Track

[Coach/captain/senior figures/sources close to the club/a guy at the local) has been deeply impressed by (insert players name)’s (form/fitness/attitude/lack of arrests/attendance) this pre-season.

‘He’s definitely set numerous personal bests on the track and the other guys are noticing,’ said (coach/captain/senior teammate/another journalist I interviewed).

“He’s returned (focused/with a renewed commitment/with a greater maturity/sober/with no pending court dates/in not that bad shape/no new restraining orders),” said (coach/captain/senior teammate).

It’s believed (insert players name) has (never been fitter/has put on more muscle/is leaner/is in the best shape of his career/is injury free for the first time in X years) and could spend more time (in the midfield/up forward/rotating through the ruck/rotating through the forward line/rotating through the back line/playing as a key position player).

“(Insert players name) has been flying on the track, it’s early but he’s definitely setting himself up for a huge year,” said (coach/captain/senior teammate/someone on Twitter).

It’s understood (his recent brush with death/ his time in lock up/ his trip home to his family/a tough talk with the coach/ his belief in god/his [new/old] girlfriend/the support of his teammates) are behind his new (maturity/sobriety/effort/commitment/lack of arrests).

“He just hasn’t put a foot wrong since returning from the off season break,’ said (coach/captain/senior teammate/a blog I stumbled upon).

Sources close to the club say (Insert players name) is even being considered for the newly expanded leadership group that will now consist of 20 players.

“We’ve all been very pleased with his progress in such a short period of time. While it’s early days, (Insert players name) has been training the house down*.’

*Must be included