Apr 21, 2015
AFL
New Zealand severs diplomatic relations in response to St Kilda v Carlton
The New Zealand government has announced it will sever all diplomatic relations with Australia in response to this weekend’s St Kilda v Carlton AFL match.
“Why is Australia doing this to us?” asked New Zealand Prime Minister John Key.
“What have we ever done to them? Except for giving them Russell Crowe and at least he wins things.”
New Zealand High Commissioner to Australia, His Excellency Mr Chris Seed said ‘friends don’t send friends St Kilda and Carlton’.
“I know only expats will probably go to the game but it’s the principle that counts.”
“Kids could see it and then what? The New Zealand tax payer foots the bill for years of counselling.
“I mean they could have at least sent us North Melbourne if they didn’t want to send any stars over.”
Australian Foreign Affairs Minister Julie Bishop said while she was disappointed that New Zealand would sever relations, she did understand it.
“To send St Kilda there year-after-year is one thing but to then add Carlton? It’s just cruel.”
St Kilda CEO Matt Finnis said he was disappointed with the New Zealand government’s response.
“Don’t they know our strategic plan calls for us to have 10,000 members over there?”
“It’s an exciting opportunity for New Zealanders to see stars like Sam Fisher, Cameron Shenton and Tim Membrey in the flesh.”
Carlton refused to comment directly on the decision but said it hoped it meant Mark Stevens would be denied entry.
COMMENTS
Nigel
Apr 21, 2015
Ha ha ha....... How angry will Malthouse be if the Blues Lose. Can't wait.
Leon
Apr 21, 2015
To be fair they also sent us Derryn Hinch, Richard Wilkins (nee Wilde) and Keith Urban. Doesn't justify St Kilda AND Carlton, but they are not without blame.
The Original Buzz
Apr 21, 2015
I would have thought the underarm bowling incident would have been sufficient to sever ties and damage relationships permanently but to send St Kilda and Carlton transcends that. Oh, the Horror!
Mr Wisdom's Whopper
Apr 21, 2015
If they start complaining send Chris Yarran out amongst them for a "chat." He'll have time on his hands.
Old44
Apr 21, 2015
Give them Tasmania as compensation, teach them to keep their mouths shut.
Tassie52
Apr 24, 2015
Kangaroo Island would be a better choice. Leave Tassie alone, we have a rich heritage of AFL Legends eg Peter Hudson, Darrel Baldock, Ian Stewart ect.
Mick_EFC
Apr 26, 2015
A Tasmanian leaving an internet comment! What kind of dark magic allows you to post without electricity and reading comprehension?
Old44
May 01, 2015
It was his other head wot dun it.
Daniel Cohen
Apr 21, 2015
It will be a spectacle. Like an NBA All Star game with the lack of defensive pressure. It might also lack offensive pressure though.
Mitch Brown
Apr 21, 2015
Ben Hatherall
Dylan Mathews
Apr 21, 2015
Sam Mathews Second last paragraph is pure gold!
Shane Cook
Apr 21, 2015
Bryce Sheedy
John Dawson
Apr 21, 2015
It is a great chance for New Zealanders to see some great players. I know lots of kids are excited to see the likes of:
Nuck Riewoldt
Chrus Judd
Tum Membrey
Sam Fusher
Bryce Gubbs
Krustuan Jacksh
Patruck Crupps
Jack Bullungs...
Shame Mutch Robunson went to Brusbane really...
Brendan Gloyn
Apr 21, 2015
Chris Carrter
Mathew Rodda
Apr 21, 2015
The AFL must be feeling a bit sheepish about sending two poor quality teams to promote the game in NZ. I don't think they'll be able to pull the wool over the eyes of the local footy fans.
Rich Fairbrother
Apr 21, 2015
Josh Ashman
Anthony Reid
Apr 21, 2015
It's crazy given that Australia actually owns New Zealand
It's ours and they pay their taxes to us so
Go Saints
Lee Brown
Apr 21, 2015
Justin Familyguy
Kathryn Andrews
Apr 21, 2015
Meg Lawton
Scott Murray
Apr 21, 2015
Jordan Peeler
Dustyn Taylor
Apr 21, 2015
Brent Williams Justin Madden Dermott Taylor
Ted O'Brien
Apr 22, 2015
Dom Guiney
Stej Bosnjak
Apr 23, 2015
A game that will be so terrible, the AFL is playing it out of the country
Joanne Everett
Apr 23, 2015
Does the Land of the Long White Cloud care?