Being on the Carlton is a huge honour and thankfully comes with no need to delivering tangible outcomes, especially positive ones.
The media are reporting a possible rebel group is considering challenging the current board. Before they do so, they need to consider the strict criteria the club has for board members.
Here they are:
- Be rich. Not ‘well-off’ or even ‘really rich’, you need to be so rich you regularly forget some of the houses you own
- If you’re not rich, you better have been a star for Carlton. We would still prefer you to be really rich though
- Be willing to give a lot of your own money to Carlton to make up for the poor decisions you’ll make while on the board
- Able to operate a hovercraft
- Be keen on finding a messiah to fix all Carlton’s problems at once
- Have no qualms about pokies and accepting large chunks of revenue from them. Ensure every decision at the club has the pokies’ best interests at heart
- Be good at coping with defeat
- Think being on the Carlton board is actually a good idea
- Are willing to pretend Robert Walls’ opinions are insightful and relevant
- Think the Chris Judd trade was a good one
- We really can’t overstate how import the giving us lots of money is
COMMENTS
Victoria Jayne
Nov 13, 2015
lel Frase Eynon Cadell John
Frase Eynon
Nov 13, 2015
Save us glorious leaders
Ian Lamont
Nov 13, 2015
Also need a supply of brown paper bags.
Stej Bosnjak
Nov 13, 2015
"Be good at coping with defeat"
Wont find anyone at Carlton other than the players who fit that criteria
Penny Beitzel
Nov 13, 2015
They use cardboard boxes at Carlton. Better for Visybility.
Penny Beitzel
Nov 13, 2015
Think that Geoffrey Edelsten's waxy mug in the shadows of the coaches box isn't just a little creepy.
Ian Lamont
Nov 13, 2015
Yep...and guess who l work for
Andrew Wolf
Nov 13, 2015
How the mighty have fallen! How sweet it is!!
Adam Birman
Nov 13, 2015
Ivan Wityk James Spight Ben Joseph I just don't think we talk about carlton enough.
Craig Fairbairn
Nov 13, 2015
Robyn Revell Dallas Hurst Melinda Batrouney Brad Howard Benjamin Smith...Carlton the gift that just keeps on giving U0001f61c
Billious
Nov 13, 2015
This is so bloody unfair Titus. While we are basking in the glory of Carlton at rock bottom you are making the board role at Carlton sound attractive enough for someone else to come in and take Carlton further up the ladder to 17th position next year and spoil our fun.
Rodney Sims
Nov 13, 2015
Paul, Carolyn and Clare
Stephanie Rowan
Nov 13, 2015
"Think being on the Carlton board is a good idea". I pretty much tick all the boxes. U0001f44dU0001f3fd
Paul Bentley
Nov 13, 2015
I feel like you didn't read all the other criteria.
Stephanie Rowan
Nov 13, 2015
Nah I've got it covered.
Paul Bentley
Nov 13, 2015
How are your hovercraft skillz?
Stephanie Rowan
Nov 13, 2015
Building up. Like my super richness.
Carolyn Keast
Nov 13, 2015
If I was standing in front of you buddy...then my silence to your post would say it all!!
Rohan Marriott
Nov 14, 2015
Sounds like it a job for myself
Allan Knight
Nov 14, 2015
Pretend that Brendon Bolton knows what he's doing.