Channel Nine’s cricket commentary can get worse by ‘several orders of magnitude’ according to Brad McNamara, Nine's executive producer of cricket.

After a summer that has lowered the bar beyond what anyone thought possible, the morale in the commentary box is at an all time high.

“When the summer started, I knew we could be bad, perhaps even awful, but there’s been some next level stuff recently,” said Mr McNamara.

“Take for instance the conversation about which Australian players are nerds and which are julios, we stretched it over two days!”

One of the key contributors to Nine’s stunning awfulness, Ian Healy said Shane Warne had really come into his own this summer.

“How good was that discussion about what’s the best pizza? He’s an innovator Warnie, soon he’ll be able to go several days without referring to the cricket at all,” said Mr Healy.

“For example, he’s planning on reading out his tweets on air tomorrow, all 14,000-odd of them.”

Mr McNamara said the commentary team had been working on new ways to irritate fans.

“We plan to stop mentioning the other team altogether, except for Ian Chappell who will still criticise the opposing captains tactics.”

“We’ve also invented this fast-tennis thing, solely to annoy cricket fans when we cross promote it ad nauseam throughout the cricket.

“It adds another string to our bow, beyond pummeling you with mentions of The Block.”

Note: Michael Slater was also interviewed for this piece but I drifted off during one of his anecdotes. When I came to a few hours later he was still talking.

I snuck out while he was still going. I think he’s still there, even though the cleaners turned the lights off an hour ago.