AFL CEO Gillon McLachlan Holds Press Conference

AFL excited to set purely symbolic example

The AFL says it’s keen to be a leader on social issues such as racism or violence against women, as long as it doesn’t require doing anything too drastic.

“Our commitment to social issues such as violence against women, is strongest at the symbolic stage,” said AFL CEO Gillon McLachlan.

“Think of us more like a mascot, we don’t participate on the field but we’re on the sidelines cheering. Mascots are important, everyone loves mascots.”

Mr McLachlan said he could see how the AFL’s commitment to campaigns such as White Ribbon Day and organisations like Our Watch, could confuse people into thinking they would actually do something when tangible examples arrive.

“People forget that changing society is a massive pain in the arse. You have to sometimes do things that aren’t in your organisations best interests or your own. That’s not really our thing.”

“Life is more complex than that. That’s why next year we’ll be participating in ‘Shades of Grey Ribbon Day’ and supporting a new organisation ‘Occasionally Checking In’.

The AFL will also establish a new fast track apology system for when people say or do things which clash with the causes the AFL is using in its marketing.

“Saying you’re ‘sorry if people were offended’ and paying a bit of money to a charity will now instantly absolve anyone of wrong doing.”

“It’s important we get the feel good factor of being linked to these causes, without effecting our ability to put our agenda first.”

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  1. JosephShizbags

    Eddie’s mask slipped a bit (again) and we got more of a glimpse of what’s under the Italian suit.

  2. MacHawk

    Well, maybe drowning Caroline Wilson in a bathtub full of ice is a bit over the top but I do get where Eddie is coming from. I regard myself as borderline SNAG when it comes to women’s issues and rights but whenever Caro opens her mouth I revert to macho pig levels that feel very uncomfortable for my carefully cultivated politically correct image. That is why I share this deep resentment for Caro. Hillary Clinton has a similar effect on me.

  3. Budgietits

    MackHawk you’ve nailed it on the Caro/Eddie issue. So insightful & succinct..
    Are you sure you’re not moonlighting as Titus himself ?
     Need to add that I feel very uncomfortable supporting Eddie on any subject especially his ‘impartiality’ as a commentator. Ruins my night seeing that head pretending to be professional when he should be home with the family.

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